I Love My Pets

• "The average dog is a nicer person than the average person." - Andrew A. Rooney
• "The difference between cats and dogs is, dogs come when they are called, cats take a message and get back to you." - Unknown
• Every dog has his day -- but the nights are reserved for the cats. - Unknown
• A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself. - Josh Billings
• In dog years I'm dead. - Unknown
• It you want a friend, get a dog. - Carl Icahn, US auto business executive
• I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves. - August Strindberg
• A cat sees us as the dogs...A cat sees himself as the human. - Unknown
• A dog is not almost-human, and I know of no greater insult to the canine race than to describe it as such. - John Holmes
• My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can. That's almost $7.00 in dog money. - Joe Weinstein
• "How's it going Mr. Peterson?" - Woody "It's a dog eat dog world, Woody, and I'm wearing milk bone underwear". - Norm from Cheers
• No man can be condemned for owning a dog. As long as he has a dog, he has a friend; and the poorer he gets, the better friend he has. - Will Rogers
• Happiness to a dog is what lies on the other side of a door. - Charleton Ogburn Jr.
• When a dog wags her tail and barks at the same time, how do you know which end to believe? - Anonymous
• I named my dog 'Stay'... so I can say 'Come here, Stay. Come here, Stay.' - Steven Wright
• I spilled spot remover on my dog. He's gone now. - Steven Wright
• I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman
• It's hard to teach an old dog new tricks. - Unknown
• If a picture wasn't going very well I'd put a puppy dog in it, always a mongrel, you know, never one of the full bred puppies. And then I'd put a bandage on its foot... I liked it when I did it, but now I'm sick of it. - Norman Rockwell
• To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley
• Qui me amat, amet et canem meum. ("Love me, love my dog.") - St. Bernard, A.D. 1150, Sermo Primus
• The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven, not man's. - Mark Twain, Letter to W D Howells, 4/2/1899
• If you can't decide between a Shepherd, a Setter or a Poodle, get them all ... adopt a mutt! - ASPCA
• DOG, n. A subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the world's worship . . . . [H]is master works for the means wherewith to purchase the idle wag of the Solomonic tail, seasoned with a look of tolerant recognition. - Ambrose Bierce The Devil's Dictionary, 1911.
• The more I see of the representatives of the people, the more I admire my dogs. - Alphonse de Lamartine
• Newfoundland dogs are good to save children from drowning, but you must have a pond of water handy and a child, or else there will be no profit in boarding a Newfoundland. - Josh Billings
• The poor dog, in life the firmest friend, The first to welcome, foremost to defend. - Lord Byron
• The reason a dog has so many friends, is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue - Anonymous